Turkey Brain Fog

I headed out yesterday on to buy the makings for our upcoming Thanksgiving Day feast. I chose a specific grocery store that had a money saving promotion: if I bought a certain dollar amount of groceries, I could purchase a turkey for 25 cents/pound. Woo.

So I cruised through every aisle of the grocery store, shopping list in hand. Meeting the dollar amount for the turkey promotion wasn't an issue, believe me, as I filled my extra large shopping cart to the brim. We are planning on 25 guests this year, after all, and we all enjoy all the traditional menu items - turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, gravy.....and of course pumpkin pie. I was on a mission to procure everything that we could possibly need.

However. I probably should have chosen a different day to shop, since I had been rather busy earlier in the day. As I made my way through the store, I could feel my energy begin to wane. Drat. I could tell this by my increased fatigue, of course, but also by the appearance of that very strange frame of mind when I get tired - the manifestation of that unerringly accurate energy equation: TIRED = STUPID. Somewhere in the back of my foggy brain, warning bells began to ring......BETTER HEAD HOME NOW, JULIA.....but the warning was too late. I had already tossed aside my shopping list and began to hum tunelessly as I drifted off into tired but stupid and happy Julia-land.

La de da.....ooooooooo......I think we really need to serve Rice Krispy treats at some point during this meal.....(WHAT? WHAT? SO NOT on the menu, Julia!) Gosh. Where on earth did that strangely annoying thought come from? Plop, plop. Thud. Two packages of marshmallows and one giant cereal box were tossed into the cart.

Well, hey now! Frozen pizzas. Mmm. Love those thick crust kinds. And - on sale! I LOVE THIS STORE! Thud, thud, thud. I think three should be enough. Pizza goes with everything, doesn't it?

Doo de doo de doo.....I suppose I should do some cleaning before everyone gets here. And lookee here.......wow, those fluffy disposable duster thingies. And only a dollar apiece...I guess that's not so bad. How convenient - they come in a giant economy package which is actually the same price per duster as the smaller package! I'll get two...whap, whap.

Let's see now.....it seems as though I'm missing something here. I paused to dig around in my pockets for the shopping list. Now where did that thing go? Giggle. Ah, well. WE DON'T NEED NO STINKIN' SHOPPING LIST! Yum! Tortilla chips! And salsa! Good thinking, Julia. We were out of salsa.....

I heaved the overflowing grocery cart toward the checkout lane, and smugly noticed a harried-looking woman race back to the frozen foods, and reappear moments later lugging a giant frozen bird.

Sheesh. Some people are so forgetful.....hehe.

As I pulled Goldie into the garage, John eyed the dozens of tightly packed grocery bags. "Wow. Sure looks as though you got everything! Where's the turkey? I'll throw that into the freezer right away."

Turkey......Turkey.....Turkey. What's a turkey, again? Oh, righto - that big frozen poultry thing....Honey? Funny story! You'll never guess! Har har....the turkey!!

Honey? Feeling like heading down to the grocery store? I think I'll just toddle off to bed....la de da.....Oh, and unload all those groceries like a dear, will you?

What's that? Don't mumble, darling......Yes, I DID do a great job shopping today..

Image found on Wikimedia Commons.