I've struggled with my Bratty Inner Child Julia for most of my adult life, and until recently, her tantrum's effects have been limited to me. And, for the most part, I can usually control her by alternating wheedling and lion tamer methods.
However, lately she's been moving into new Bratty territory. She's begun to terrorize others. Case in point: Last night, John and I went out to dinner with a large group of our friends. BICJ had decided this would be an evening jam packed with calories.
BICJ: Mmmmm.....an Italian restaurant tonight......pasta pasta pasta.......warm buttery bread sticks.....isn't it great that now we're on prednisone, we tolerate wheat better? Party on, Julia!
Me: well..........OK.
I'm such a pushover sometimes. And when I gave in, there was no stopping BICJ. I listened helplessly as she promptly began relentlessly bullying the rest of our dinner party: You're only ordering soup and salad? Are you crazy? Here, have some of our appetizers. Have a bread stick, these are especially good today......try this pasta sauce, it's incredible......
BICJ really flexed her muscles when it came time for dessert: Attention, everyone! I insist that we all order dessert. What? You're going to split something? No way! Order something so that we all can have a chance to taste it. Well, yes, the serving sizes are enormous but that's OK because you can give us all a bite. You don't like chocolate? Are. You. Crazy?! Isn't anyone ordering carrot cake? How can we have dessert without carrot cake? And a slice of that orange cremesicle cake......looks divine....If you don't choose something I'm ordering it for you. So get on it. My treat. I insist.
Everyone protested, but eventually gave in. I knew what Bratty Inner Child Julia was up to. She wanted two things: first, to ensure that we weren't alone in feeling bloated and remorseful the next morning, and secondly - to have carrot cake for breakfast.
Run for your lives! She's a real stinker, that one.
Image found here.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
There She Goes Again
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1 comment:
BICJ is quite a character, no wonder she overpowered you, Julia.I hope you both enjoyed your evening out and savored every morsel of your food. Was there wine involved?
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